I know I didn't really mention it but when I went to visit Tallahassee last week, I also went to see my Grandma who has Alzheimer's and is living in an assisted living facility down there.
During college, I spent a lot of time with my Grandparents; from Sunday meals to running errands around town. But after my Poppy died during my sophomore year, I sort of became of my Meme's caretaker. It got hard after he passed. They had been married for almost 60 years, and it seemed as if her mind couldn't really deal with it. She began to forget things and the doctor told us that she was displaying early signs of Dementia. At first we laughed about her using sugar instead of salt in her tomato gravy and rice, but it got to the point where she needed some serious help and unfortunately, I was planning on moving to New York for grad school that same summer. The decision to leave was really hard, but luckily, I had my amazing uncle there to help as much as he could. After I left, the inevitable happened, the disease got a hold of her and was she diagnosed with Alz.
I'm not going to put on a front and say it was lovely and wonderful seeing her last week because it wasn't. It was really, really, really freaking hard. I mean, luckily, she still remembers all of us, but it's not the same. She's not really there and she knows it. It's tough seeing her like that. And because of it, I wanted to make a post to celebrate my Meme by commemorating her amazing hospitality and love. This little snack was something that she'd whip up, pop in the oven, and then forget about it for the next few minutes while she caught up with me. It was also perfect for times when I brought over my starving college friends, because she could fill a whole baking sheet and not have to tend to the frying pan like with traditional grilled cheese sandwiches. Honestly, she's the best, you'd love her...even when she gets a little sassy...and she does get a little sassy.
As I mentioned before, those iconic ingredients are:
Ingredients:
- 2 slices of lite boule or some white bread
- ½ cup of shredded fontina
- 1 giant beefsteak tomato slice
- 1 tablespoon of herbed butter
(combine 1 tablespoon salted butter with ½ teaspoon herbs
de provence)
My entire family is obsessed with butter. I'm not kidding, not even a little bit. I once saw teeth marks in a tub of I Can't Believe it's Not Butter. Who does that?? I still think it was my Dad but he'll never fess up. But yeah, my mom always bought that kind because if we had the good stuff in our fridge, it would be devoured, along with every single piece of bread or cracker in the house. But before I gross you out any longer...
To begin, go ahead and butter your bread with some delicious herbed butter. Feel free to mix up with anything you'd like; garlic or thyme-infused butter would work wonderfully.
During the next step, you'll want to preheat your oven to 450°. Then put the bread, butter side down, onto a baking sheet. Then sprinkle it with fontina cheese. My Meme always used government cheese cheddar but I just did cheddar in last week's post so I wanted to switch it up.
Next, you'll want a nice thick slice of tomato to lay down right in the middle of the sandwich. Sometimes Meme would salt and pepper it, but I never knew when to do that so I left it out. Whenever I tried , it would always come out too salty. I guess she just had some sort of magic touch.
When it's all built, go ahead and place the baking sheet on the middle rack for about six and a half minutes. This will give you ample time to pour someone a sweet tea and bring them a cookie.*
And then when it's all bubbly and golden, take it out and fold the two pieces together to make a sandwich.
Give it a second to rest because if you cut it right away, the tomato will slip out and burn your chin. I'm speaking from experience, of course.
I know that Meme will probably never see this because I don't think she even knows what the internet is, but at least I can share it with all of you. I know Alz can be hard, but it's best to treasure the good times and this sandwich definitely helps me do that. It reminds me of being a little kid and sitting in her kitchen while she helped me with ALL of my problems. As I ate this after I shot it, I got a little teary eyed because I wish I could have been eating it with her. I know she probably feels the same way.
And if you're feeling generous, th
e Alzheimer's Assocation is a wonderful not-for-profit group that would love your help to keep fighting the memory loss battle. And for those of you who are struggling with the same thing, stay strong and keep loving! Hopefully there will be a cure soon.
xoxo,
GCS
chemgirl
that looks so fucking yummy... meme's always make the best food!
Jessica @ bake me away!
I'm sorry that your grandmother and you and your family are dealing with Alzheimer's. One of my grandpas had that and yep, it's awful. 🙁 But it's nice that you can remember the good times and recreate the food she made! This sandwich looks awesome. I'll have to try herbed butter on grilled cheese soon!
Megan Morrison
Had to comment... I had a Meme. She passed away a few years ago. Don't hear that name used for Grandmothers very often!! Sandwich looks delicious 🙂
MyInnerCheerleader
The grilled cheese is calling my name and your Alz touched my heart. Both my grandmothers suffer from Alz. It is a heartbreaking disease that not many understand unless they have someone close to them going through it.
JLove
Woman! This website is pretty much the best thing that has ever happened to me. If I could eat grilled cheese every meal I would just be so happy! Grilled cheese with tomato is my all time favorite...my grandma would always make this for me after school when I was younger, brought back lots of memories. xoxo
Dzoli
It is ahrd when the loved oen is not around anymore.I hate when people ask you than:How old was she .My Grandma was 87 and than comments :Oh she lived so long...Yes but because she lived so long I knew her all my life and miss her even more.Any words to say to you would sound like cliche so I wish you strength to deal with your grief..
Lila
Well shit, now I'm crying at work.
Ashley Johnson
Kenz! This post definitely hit home.. My grandmother who suffered from that terrible disease died 5 years ago. I know how hard it is, but just keep your head up and cherish every moment. Ughhh you've got me all teary now! Anyway, this is an amazing post, as always. Love you!!!
Angela
This is a great post, despite the sadness. Your Meme tought you how to show a family member love and kindness through food, among other things. Reminds me of the lessons my Pap Pap tought me, with food and otherwise: http://alohayinzmangia.blogspot.com/2010/09/pap-paps-birthday.html
Keep up the good work!
brett
Your post brought me to tears! You nailed one of Meme's favorite cure all sandwich 's. Meme fed many generations this grilled cheese! Thank you for being a wonderful, caring daughter and most important Grandaughter!